[Poem Discussion]: On Outcomes

We came here to win, but got a tomato instead. What now?

Dear reader,

Welcome back to our contemplative corner of the cosmos.

Today’s reflection will be on outcomes: also known as results, scores, products, or fruits of labor. They all mean the same thing: a final state as a culmination of effort. These outcomes are often what are used to determine the quality or worth of the work which was put in over time. However, to use a result as a metric of success does not always capture the whole picture.

Outcomes defining success

I am sure that we have all experienced a situation where we did everything correctly and still wound up with an undesirable outcome. Perhaps you can align with one or a few of these scenarios:

• Researched a topic, wrote up a technically perfect article, and then posted it to receive far lower than anticipated engagement. (perhaps too real on this platform).

• In your baseball game, you went 4-4 with 2 doubles, 2 singles, 3 RBI and fielded all plays in your area of the outfield correctly, only to be beaten 6-4.

• You perfectly describe a work process, set up a system to carry it forward in the future, only to have technology fail and cause your plan to crumble.

• You wore your mask, you washed your hands, you stayed away from social functions and still somehow got sick.

• You left home early and with plenty of time to arrive at your event, but an accident on the freeway caused you to be late, missing your slotted presentation time.

If none of these resonate, then perhaps something in a similar vein comes to mind with the following formula: “I planned well for X, but instead of X I got a tomato.” Those surprise tomatoes will get you every time.

Or will they? Perhaps there is a way in which we can make use of that tomato after all, or better yet, be grateful for it even though it wasn’t something we knew was going to land in our lap.

Epictetus On Outcomes

We’ve had a streak of Epictetus references recently, and for good reason. Born into slavery, he had every reason possible to lash out against his station in life and decry the inhumane nature at the core of such unjust servitude. This would be the lamentation of an outcome, in the same way we could find cause for complaint with the (admittedly less serious) examples listed above.

But no, this is not what happened. Epictetus owned his fate, and even went so far as to be appreciative for it. He brandished his past as a sharp blade, cutting through to his students in lectures focused on empowering them to live a more virtuous life in agreement with nature and encouraging them to shed their own psychic shackles. A couple of quotes from his work illustrate this initiative.

“There is no call to be a regular at the public games. But if the occasion should arise and you go, don’t be seen siding with anyone except yourself; which is to say, hope only for what happens to happen, and for the actual winner to win; then you won’t be unhappy.”

– Enchiridion 33.10

“Don’t hope that events will turn out the way you want, welcome events in whichever way they happen: this is the path to peace.”

– Enchiridion 8

Both of these quotes boil down to the same concept: So long as we chase a specific result in any endeavor, we will be a slave to them. These endeavors and any who control them will be masters of our minds. This is a volunteering of the only things we truly control – our impulses, our thoughts, and our actions – of which we are all guilty. What happens as a result of our efforts is only partially up to us, and as such deserves almost none of our attention. Instead, we should focus on the effort we put into the work and let the outcome be what it is. How many times have we each thought to ourselves, “Why are they so upset? It is only a game.” or “What’s gotten into you? You did your best.”, only to then lose our composure ourselves when the baby cries or when the driver cuts us off in traffic? We don’t have the level of control over results we either think we do or wish we did. This is the core message behind On Outcomes.

On Outcomes

The flows of events
are not up to us to choose. 
The cosmos guides us. 
We may have control
of our actions and our words,
but not of outcomes. 
Even if we do
all things in line with Nature,
we might not succeed. 
Ah, but wait right there! 
How do we decide success? 
Is it by who wins? 
Are you then a slave
to reputation, fame, and 
others’ opinions? 
Your success arrives
when you wish for things to go
the way they will go. 
Abolish your wants. 
Trust the cosmos and make use
of what it provides. 

Reflection

I acknowledge that if we are to do as Epictetus suggests and give up our flimsy grasp on external results, then we have much work to do individually and also as a society, especially in the West where individuality and an outcome-based obsession dictates what a successful life looks like. We are driven to want more – to earn more, to win more, to do more, to succeed at all costs and to pay no mind to any we disadvantage or marginalize along the way. This style of thinking is antiquated, outdated, inhumane and in need of revising if any of us seek to live well. A successful human life is not one in which someone gathers material wealth and influence in exchange for their soul – at that point, the life is more material than it is human. Instead, to live well we must redefine success in terms of how kindly we show up for others, and limit our metrics to things which are fully within our control – the quality of our thoughts, actions, and character. These are outcomes which are both up to us and vastly more important than any material outcome, regardless of what society has trained us to believe.

What We Can Do

Be ready for that tomato. Yes, the unexpected tomato. You may ask, “How do I plan for the tomato?” An excellent question indeed – one that has been asked through the ages, I am sure.

The tomato is a stand-in for any unexpected outcome which runs parallel to your preferred one – your preference to win, to avoid getting sick, to arrive somewhere on time, to fix the process at work, etc. The way to be ready for the tomato is to accept that things may go differently than you expect, and change your expectation from “I will not get sick” to instead read something like, “If things go my way, I will not get sick.” This builds in the acknowledgement that outcomes are not fully up to you. Next, do a little negative visualization for in case things do not go your way. “If I get sick, I will need some supplies to manage symptoms. I should get those from the store soon.”

Expect the tomato, accept the tomato, plan for the tomato. These are what are in your power. Whether or not the tomato appears isn’t. Either way, you can now make a delicious bruschetta.

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